I like my life to be the way it is, normal,same type of routine everyday
more or less. I don't like change. That's the truth, full stop, end of
sentence. I do not like change. I don't want life my life to be a constant
repetition but I want or like control over most things. Change makes me
uncomfortable and unsure, my schedules and routines get messed up and it can
mean that I have to leave a special place, thing or person behind. I get scared
when things change and it can mean that I have to cut or sever a tie or bond.
Let me explain my reasons so that you have a clear picture.
First of all, when things change I become uncomfortable. For example I
need to carry particular things with me almost everywhere. I need a necklace on
at all times, sometimes I forget to put it on and I feel like I'm missing a
part of me and my peace of mind, I also need to have my comb-mirror thingy ,
lip balm and to a certain extent kajal. Things that I identify with home or
normality always calm me down, and make me feel like I am perfectly prepared. I
generally have a bag which has my stuff wherever I go. Without things like
these I come up with a million situations when or where I could have used them.
This always leaves my unsure of things and uncomfortable, even though it's
small it can leave me shaken. Some how these things just calm me down.
Moving on to the next reason, change is very disruptive, it is like it
was made to annoy me. I get annoyed when someone changes their schedule and it
changes mine. I don't like to change my routine because I find it quite hard to
adapt to new schedules, surroundings and things. When this happens I end up
wasting time and being confused. When my room is cleaned I never like it
because my haven or little corner of this world is being changed. I react
strongly and my mood is messed up. This can can even be a huge thing when my
mom volunteers for a new thing all of a sudden. It takes time to adapt and get
used to things and that's what I hate.
My final reason is that when things change it can mean that a person ,
place or thing that is special to me is left behind . When my mom tries to
clean my room , she always picks out my old things like toys, books, clothes
and other odd things. But I can't throw them away! They are like old friends
and symbols of my life and they hold so many memories. Once I had my hair cut
and besides tears streaming down my face when it was cut I kept the cut hair
after that , in fact I still have the hair I'm too attached.
I realize that even though I don't like change , it doesn't mean I can
stop it or escape it. I will still have to ' Go with the flow ' and accept it .
Even though change unnerves me , I can and will understand and will overcome my
fears. This also makes me feel that change is not always 'evil' and
sometimes for the better, like when a person changes for the better, sure it is
change , it is hard to adapt to and even worse when they change too much but
its acceptable I can't do anything about it .
Only recently I have come to terms with my thoughts on change. I even
feel that my personality has stayed the same but also means I can't get
rid of bad habits. I doubt and second guess myself when things change .And this
brings me to the end of explaining to you why I don't like change . Ho much are
you willing to let change change you ?
"Our dilemma is that we hat change and love it at the same time ;
what we really want is for things to remain the same but get better"
-Sydney J.Harris
Shreya Nair 8IC
No comments:
Post a Comment